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War By Wire Service

I flipped around the dial tonight, sampling war coverage on each of the three networks plus CNN and the unintentionally comical Fox News. Apparently, all war coverage will consist of the same shot of the same part of the Baghdad skyline while the lead anchor and the designated correspondent/military expert/talking head blather on in the background, swapping theory and conjecture. Occasionally, over on Fox News, a trained news professional will read what AP and Reuters are reporting.

Oh, and I wish I would have bought stock in whatever company invented those crawling news tickers that have spread across the news channels like a rash on a fratboy's bottom a week after spring break.

Fox News -- which we must remember is fair and balanced and, therefore, unintentionally comical -- jazzes up its news ticker with minute-by-minute updates of our nation's terror alert status. I don't know about you, but I find it especially soothing and not-in-the-least-bit unsettling to see the words "TERROR ALERT: HIGH" scroll across my screen every 60 seconds or so in bright orange type.

Oh, thank you, Rupert Murdoch, for taking the soft, deft touch you brought to reality programming and extending it to news coverage!


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