Hearts and Minds, Baby
Hello, TeeVee readers! This is James Collier reporting live from Baghdad. As has been recently reported, the U.S. and Britain have just launched a new TV service for the Iraqi people. I'm here speaking to everyday Iraqis about what they would like the coalition forces to broadcast. Sir, what is your name?
My name is Tariq al-Shara.
And Tariq, what would you like to see on Coalition television?
I would like to see the entire run of 'Freaks and Geeks'!
You, sir, what would you like to see?
I would like to see the final episode of "M.A.S.H." I was in Saddam's torture chamber when it was broadcast. I need closure. Tell me, did the people of "M.A.S.H." finally get to go home?
Everybody got to go home... but it's a shame what happened to Colonel Potter.
Did he die?
No, worse -- "AfterMASH."
You, ma'am, what would you like to see?
Saddam bad! George Bush good! I want my MTV!
And what about you? Is there anything you'd like to share?
Yes, President George Bush, for the love of Allah, no Jim Belushi! And please send American whiskey!
Well, there you have it: No Jim Belushi, and send American whiskey. I don't know about you, but I think the Iraqis are gonna be all right. This is James Collier, reporting live from Baghdad.
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