12/28/04
House of Pain
I recently attended a bridal shower in which the hostesses had us pre-address our own thank-you note envelopes for the gifts. I really don't like this: I feel like it puts gift-givers on the spot and makes them feel as though the bride-to-be doesn't feel as though she's sending a thank-you note out of obligation, but duty. The hostesses are planning on throwing a bridal party luncheon. How can I make sure they don't embroil the bride in another etiquette faux pas? -- Painfully Polite
You get two of us. Lucky you. We wrote our answer in dialogue form below:
Hauk: Why not just argue for convenience? Brides got a lotta things to do, maybe they appreciate a pre-addressed envelope?
Carver: Brides, sure. The people who get the notes, not so much.
Hauk: Why do they care?
Carver: Have you ever been on the wrong side of a group slander?
Hauk: You know perfectly well I have not. I'm untouchable.
Carver: You know, this is why I think we can't really answer this question.
Hauk: Why?
Carver: It's like this. Brides screw up, they get beaten. We screw up, we get a pension.
Posted by Ellis Carver and Thomas Hauk at 9:18 PM
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